


All I Know Are Sad Songs

by wycliffe



Series: The Commuter Diaries [1]
Category: London Spy
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-15
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-08-08 23:46:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7778341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wycliffe/pseuds/wycliffe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens if Danny and Alex had normal parents growing up. Aka the boys got to have nurturing childhoods, and didn't grow up scarred, and managed get to find each other anyways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is amateur writing at its pain fullest, not the elaborate prose you'd expect. All mistakes are mine. All spelling mistakes are my phone's fault. Think of it as a summary rather than a drabble.

What if they had a chance in life? In this version, they did.

When Danny was seven, his mother was reported for domestic abuse by a neighbour. Child services took him away, and it was a strange few months going from custody to estranged family members before he was adopted by an older childless couple by the Scottish borders. He'd spent his teenage years binging on excessive hormones and teenage angst, begrudgingly going to family counselling and getting involved into every illegal thing he could. He'd had a fight with his mom one night, a school night when he should have stayed in to study, instead he'd shouted the one thing he wished he could take back, that his mom had no say because she wasn't his real mom and he wishes he were dead than here. He'd ran off to the house party his mom tried to stop him from attending. He had a miserable time, only mildly drowned out by the joint he'd smoked and the drinks he'd been offered.

He snuck home at three in the morning, the lights completely out and he'd tried to get up the stairs without stepping on that one spot that squeaks like crazy. He was half way up when he noticed the sound from the kitchen. The sound of his mother crying.

His heart sank. He walked back down to where she was, hands covering her face, in complete disheveled. And Danny, his heart began to physically hurt. He didn't even know it could hurt like this, and he walked up to his mother and took a seat beside her. She looked up in surprise, her face blotchy, and eyes bloodshot red.

Danny held her hand.

This was when Danny was 16. His mother never asked him to apologize. He made sure that he never had to again. He'd tried to never make her cry again, but it was difficult when she got so emotional at times, his prom, his graduation, his first recital at university. He made sure to hug her every time the tears came, and told her he loved her.

Danny joined orchestra in high school initially to impress the boy he'd crushed on. He started on violin and hated the painful screech it produced, but somehow was doing fairly well despite only "practicing" during orchestra. After his vow to get better, he'd stopped hanging out with his usual crew, and the orchestra was a safe heaven where he knew he could produce something wonderful, where he could be part of a team. His former friends had retaliated that one time by locking him in the orchestra backroom when he was staying late to practice for a solo audition. It worked out for the best though, while stuck there for the night Danny managed to try out every broken instrument in the repair cabinet, including an old viola with a puncture right in its belly. No one wanted to play viola in the orchestra, and it was always a running joke that viola was better used as firewood, but Danny was hooked. E managed to save up to fix the viola, and had played it day and night, almost possessed by it. He'd convinced his family to pay for music lessons with a professional orchestra player the year before he graduated. It should have been too late to advance into a professional career for him, but he managed to get into a community college, and a year later, transferred to University of Birmingham. All things considered, despite not having much, and living in an apartment with no hit water, he was doing ok. He'd graduated for two years now and was doing gigs here and there, flying regularly to different locations for performance and auditions, in between giving private music lessons to make ends meet. It would be years before he would end up with something stable, a salary in an orchestra, but he quite enjoys subbing in to different groups now, playing shows here and there. Maybe one day he'd like to settle down and have children, but it's just not a practical thought at the moment. Same with relationships, it was difficult maintaining them when he didn't know where he'd be the next year. But Danny was a romantic, he knows the right one will get here one day. And he would know.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And then there's Alex.

Alex Laurence, son of Alice Laurence (nee Alice Ashfield), remembers little of the fire that nearly killed him and his mother as a child. The police never determined the cause of fire, it would have been in vain anyways as the owners had perished, with no next of kin for insurance. There was little salvageable from the structure, now a burnt down ruin in the English countryside. 

Alex' mum worked as a housekeeper for the Turners at the time of the fire. After the funeral, she moved York where she finally found a kind landlord who took a chance on her in the flat, despite the fact that she was living in benefits and couldn't afford the deposit. They married a few years later.

Alex excelled at school, taking a keen interest in the maths and sciences. His parents cultivated his interests by taking him to science lectures and math competitions on weekends. He was finding school incredibly dull, and so they introduced him to the local university database where he could get access to endless academic papers to feed his interests. His parents insisted that he have the entire schooling experience, rather than skipping to graduation, even if he had a difficult time making friends and fitting in during social situations. 

When Alex finally attended uni at the age of 18, on a full scholarship, he finally felt for the first time like he fit in. There were like minded people, interesting ideas, and a lack of concern for silly details like gossip and parties. He stayed in academic, obtaining a master's and then a PHD in physics. He played around with the idea of joining MI5 after graduation, but for whatever reason his application never made it past the screening round.

Alex had a difficult time reading emotions, it wasn't until high school when the school psychologist diagnosed him with Aspergers. He's learned coping skills since to navigate the world, ticks and signs that indicate someone wants to be left alone, or that they mean the opposite of what they are saying. He had, eventually made strong friendships, and even some relationships, to Alice's delight.

So, thay's Alex.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, their paths crossed. Several times, in fact.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a work in progress, to be finalized shortly.
> 
> Just want to say thank you for the comments and kudos! I started writing these as a way to do something productive during my commute, it was a pleasant surprise to find the others are also enjoying the story. Hope you enjoy the next chapter!

As much of a hopeless romantic Danny was, he did not pick up on the love story until much, much later. Their paths crossed several times before he had ever noticed Alex.

The first time, Danny was 20, just relocated to Birmingham with his instrument and one suitcase. 

And he was having the most exciting relationship of his life.

Okay no, he told himself, it wasn't a relationship. Just an awful idea, really. The man was married, for start. With a 

(later: Danny having affair with married man, father of student, and hurried to the bus stop, Alex said great job back there)

****  
Alex had an exceptional memory, and he had learned throughout his teenage years that more than likely the person in question did not know him. He had a rule developed, one of his social courtesy adaptation methods, to never say hello unless the person has spoken to him first, so he didn't. He sat down two tables away, facing the boy who was too busy flipping through piles of manuscripts to look up. Alex also developed the rule to not stare (staring made others uncomfortable, his mother always told him since he was little), so he opened up a page of his book of choice, and soon was lost in the sea of mechanical dynamics. When he looked up again, having finished his book, the boy was nowhere to be seen, his table cleared out as if he was never there at all.


End file.
